Caring For A Parent
Most people visit this blog because they are caring for a parent. If you are not already actively doing this, maybe you’re here to learn some tips in advance. Smart idea. Caring for a parent is not the same as caring for a child. Whilst the ageing process can ultimately mimic returning to childhood in regards to dependency, your parents are not children.
Your children, if you are lucky, have grown and flown. You have done your caring for them. Caring for your parents as they age won’t be far away. How you think and feel about that will shape your approach and ability to cope.
Your Parents won’t want you to.
In most cases they won’t want to and know it’s going to put a strain on you, your relationships and maybe your job. They won’t want this.
They also probably don’t want a total stranger helping them either. Ultimately outside help can be a godsend and of huge benefit to all parties. I should know, I was that outside help for over 20 years. The person who begins as a stranger becomes woven into the fabric of the family over time.
I stumbled across this Ted X video on YouTube and watched it hanging on her every word.
Fortunately, at 77 my own Mum is a vessel of huge energy and life but the signs are there. The multiple replacements of bodily parts with more on the list, the losing track of her sentence and the word she needs, and the experience lines on her face are all subtle reminders.
I have been lucky, she’s an independent beast, only ever asking for help when she’s stuck or needs something printed or ordered.
It’s the little things you notice. The anxiety they feel over the things that don’t matter to us. Who cares if there are no High-Street banks anymore? The great majority of us manage our banking, and pretty much everything else online. To us, it’s easy and natural. For our parents, they manage and cope until there is a problem. Then they need not want to speak to a person face-to-face. Hard if your bank has closed.
There is more to come…. Just wanted to get this great video safely on CaronCares